I have come across an interesting book by Roy Sheppard – a relationship consultant & coach who has advised significant numbers of people on varied relationship related issues:

How To Be The One

The Daily Mail have an excellent review of the book here:

How you can be The One: The self-help path to true love

Related Posts:

• Online dating statistics – an interesting graphic and key trends
• Enjoy Your Spare Time
• Making Healthy Relationships Possible
• Valentine's Day is near – are you ready?
• Sitting is Killing You – The Truth About Sitting Down – Infographic
• Emergency Health Care For Drunks – Time For A Change
• The Body Clock Guide To Better Health
• Free Food and Medicine- live off wild and garden foods in your area
• Transform Your Marriage With 3 Keys

How To Be The One : Life-changing wisdom, insights, practical advice to help you become that special person – for them. is a post from: Joy Wizard Blog

Part of life’s experience is that we can encounter relationships that sour over time. Let this be a learning experience. In the end, there are just some things we cannot control, things that are out of our hands. For relationships to remain healthy, we need to look at ourselves first.

We must evaluate our actions and see what caused the problem in the first place. We can start by evaluating ourselves before implementing the changes from within. We cannot control the actions of other people. So instead of dwelling on what we cannot be in command of, we have to work on what we can change. It’s imperative for all of us to know the things that will enable us to become a friend, a colleague, and a partner that we want to become. We need to focus on being the right person.

Some people we come across, or are related to, will be what I call ‘toxic people‘. At times, one key solution with such people is to avoid them all-together. Personally, I have been unfortunate enough to have a number of toxic people in my close family. At one time, I was even a toxic person myself! As an aside from the main topic of this blog post — because two of the toxic people in my life were my parents (I do not see either of them now) how can we blame myself as some might interpret the Law Of Attraction? How could I have attracted awful parents? This is why we need to seek wisdom and not just blindly assume that the Law Of Attraction means that all bad things are our fault etc.

The first thing to assess is our worth and the value we have as a person. Are we the kind of friend to go the extra mile? Are we good confidants? Do we take our friends’ needs into consideration? These are only a few of the many questions we can ask ourselves. When the answer always leads to the negative, then maybe it’s high time that we think carefully about our basic inner nature and implement strategies for positive change.

The next thing to do is measure our level of commitment. Oftentimes, we don’t equate the longevity of our relationships with the kind of person we are. Of course, every situation is unique. We meet people along the way, and not many of them make ideal friends. The thing is, we have to know the cause for the breakdown of every bond we’ve created.

Then, we also weigh these against the relationships that have actually worked. We must commit ourselves to every association we find beneficial. What can help us get through life’s rough patches are the people that we’ve helped. After all, no man is an island. We need support during the most difficult of times, and the only way to make this possible is to become a true friend to the people we have in our lives. That said, spiritual adepts are aware of the experience and implications of not needing anyone to be happy, though appreciating (more than most people) good company when present.

When all is said and done, we should realize that we have the potential to be good and better people. We are more deserving of friendships when we don’t expect anything from them in return. People are naturally inclined to show kindness to those who are genuine with their deeds. As long as we stay true to ourselves and pursue worthy ideals, we can also say that we are comfortable with whom we are; which will help in our relationships. When we are happy, we are more likely to create ideal relationships.

This article has touched on some deep concepts and has only gently scratched the surface. As you dig deeper into the concepts you will enrich your life and your relationships.

You can also ask yourself: do you love people because you need them or do you need people because you love them?

Related Posts:

• How To Be The One : Life-changing wisdom, insights, practical advice to help you become that special person – for them.
• Valentine's Day is near – are you ready?
• Transform Your Marriage With 3 Keys
• Business networking – a better way
• The Stats On Internet Pornography
• Online dating statistics – an interesting graphic and key trends
• Dealing with difficult people who bring us down.
• The Innate Power of a Hug
• How to access your inner self – the real you – and why it is so important.
• Enhancing Your Conversation Skills

Making Healthy Relationships Possible is a post from: Joy Wizard Blog

Valentine’s Day will arrive on 14th of February – you have not got long to get organized if you haven’t done so already.

Stuck for ideas on how to make Valentine’s Day much more special for your partner?

Here are some tips:

• Focus intently on the other person. Not yourself. An example of how not to go about things is guys who buy their girl racy lingerie that they (the guys) like without any consideration to what she likes. Good relationships are about love, not just sex, or just what you want.
• Think creatively.
• Do or buy someting different. Unusual perhaps.
• Think carefully – thought really does count. Buying expensive gifts with little thought does not count for much.
• Allocate special ‘alone time’ for the day.
• Think of ways you can show your partner appreciation, gratitude and love.
• Buy gifts or arrange surprises according to the other person’s interests. And hey, if their interests are way different to yours and that is a problem to you; why are you with them?
• Perhaps you have realized that you don’t know much about your partner. Use the occasion as an opportunity to get to know them better.
• Ask questions and be a good listener. Don’t talk too much.
• Express love from the depths of your soul. If you don’t know how to do this then start seeking out the how. If you get stuck let me know. I can help you.
• Decide to make a better effort for your partner every day of the year, not just Valentine’s Day.
• Tailor what you say, write and do according to your partner. If they are the serious type then don’t be frivolous and so on.
• Relax. Take deep slow breaths. Tension will hinder you.
• Be with your partner – in person and mind. Don’t sit at dinner for example yakking on about what you are doing tomorrow or next week.
• Make the most of the day – it is the only one you will ever have. Live in the now – the present moment – to the full.
• Enjoy, have fun!

“Gifts They’ll Heart… at Prices You’ll Love.”

Related Posts:

• How To Be The One : Life-changing wisdom, insights, practical advice to help you become that special person – for them.
• Making Healthy Relationships Possible
• Transform Your Marriage With 3 Keys
• Business networking – a better way
• The Stats On Internet Pornography
• Online dating statistics – an interesting graphic and key trends
• Dealing with difficult people who bring us down.
• The Innate Power of a Hug
• How to access your inner self – the real you – and why it is so important.
• Enhancing Your Conversation Skills

Valentine's Day is near – are you ready? is a post from: Joy Wizard Blog

The article claims that the real culprit is technology.

I disagree. Whilst in some respects I do think that technology misused can cause friendship problems for people, I think that the real reasons for the increased isolation of some people are very different.

I have been an avid user of new technology for many years and have carefully studied its impact both on myself and others, from a human relationship perspective.

There are many ways in which modern technology is being used to enhance relationships and examples include:

1) Keeping in contact more regularly and more often – these days it is so much easier to keep in contact with others. Regular communication is one of the factors which can enhance relationships greatly.

2) The types/methods of contact are more varied today and these can enrich relationships. One less obvious example is where a young person on a world trip can regularly create a photo blog documenting their experiences and travels. Parents, family members and others and therefore feel much more involved in the young person’s life.

3) Opportunities to meet other people – the Internet has many good examples of different ways we can network and interact with others for a variety of reasons. It is very easy to seek out people of like mind, with whom we are likely to have a rapport. Rapport is one of the key relationship drivers.

4) Self acceptance – as a counselor I have at times use the Internet to to prove to people that others are just like them. This can be very liberating to some people. I have also noticed that the Internet has fostered a gradual coming out of different types of personality groups.

5) As a Private Investigator modern technology, and in particular the Internet, has helped me to locate missing family members or friends, leading to many happy reunions.

6) I met my wife online via Internet dating – this was back in the days when there was still a stigma about Internet dating and a fair bit of “media hysteria” about the subject. We have been together many years now and have a happy and fulfilling relationship. Fortunately for me, she did not turn out to be an axe murderer.

7) Recently I read an interesting article, which detailed how a young woman somewhere in Asia was saved by people online – most of them strangers – when she attempted to commit suicide. Her attempt was genuine, so the actions of these people were extremely important – she would have died without their intervention.

There are many other ways in which modern technology enhances and improves relationships & intimacy, however I want to conclude by making the simple point that like anything, technology can be misused and we all have both an opportunity, and a responsibility, to use it correctly. With a positive mind set, we will find many ways in which technology can improve our relationships.

Media, or other hysteria is unhelpful and counterproductive, and among other things, encourages the blame mentality. 2008 has arrived, the technology is here, the technology is changing the world dramatically – let’s focus on using it positively and for good.

You can read the article I refer to here:

Human contact is a cyber failing

Related Posts:

• Time zone resources
• The State Of Broadcast Television
• Internet evolution = life evolution – don’t miss this.
• My email to Senator Conroy about Australian Government mandatory internet filtering.
• Australian Government mandatory internet filtering idea is a waste of time & resources.
• Do you support the agreement Monday of three US internet providers to block all websites and newsgroups that traffic child pornography?
• Population Growth – What Should We Do? (Not Politically Correct).
• Australians Benefiting From Cruel Live Export To Middle East
• Look see post: Did the alphabet destroy the goddess?
• Craigslist – Infographic

Are cyber friends real? is a post from: Joy Wizard Blog